Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
