Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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