why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
