i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
