In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
