Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I could fuck to npr.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
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