He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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