I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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