I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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