I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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