all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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