sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
