Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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