you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
