Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
nutella sex= disaster
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize