Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
