yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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