Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
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