Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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