You're completely useless in the revolution.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize