Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Randomize
