a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Randomize
