So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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