Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I don't deserve a penis
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
