I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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