this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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