Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
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