i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
