Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(727): View more from Florida

My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo

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(727): My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo http://tfl.nu/tgva

Replies (38) Good night (848) Bad night (4705)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.

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(419): I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief. http://tfl.nu/du8g

Replies (17) Good night (976) Bad night (3351)
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(734): View more from Michigan

operation "beaches make me wet" is a go

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(734): operation "beaches make me wet" is a go http://tfl.nu/4jca

Replies (3) Good night (3276) Bad night (485)
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(585): View more from New York

This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....

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(585): This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time..... http://tfl.nu/b6dm

Replies (13) Good night (3657) Bad night (708)
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(915): View more from Texas

My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!

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(915): My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!! http://tfl.nu/a7ta

Replies (22) Good night (6146) Bad night (637)
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(807): View more from Ontario

Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables

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(807): Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables http://tfl.nu/0ytp

Replies (11) Good night (5076) Bad night (1006)
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(512): View more from Texas

I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.

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(512): I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench. http://tfl.nu/bsle

Replies (9) Good night (3312) Bad night (988)
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.

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(781): He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory. http://tfl.nu/fp19

Replies (6) Good night (780) Bad night (1841)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.

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(413): I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR. http://tfl.nu/5elj

Replies (16) Good night (2955) Bad night (781)
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(607): View more from New York

I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth

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(607): I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth http://tfl.nu/5ove

Replies (1) Good night (419) Bad night (1090)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.

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(973): Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me. http://tfl.nu/gl2k

Replies (3) Good night (560) Bad night (1068)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.

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(203): we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date. http://tfl.nu/dia7

Replies (9) Good night (784) Bad night (1389)
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(907): View more from Alaska

It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.

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(907): It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls. http://tfl.nu/6ztr

Replies (2) Good night (367) Bad night (950)
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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems

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(303): I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems http://tfl.nu/a77h

Replies (0) Good night (539) Bad night (246)
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(705): View more from Ontario

Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.

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(705): Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast. http://tfl.nu/az13

Replies (5) Good night (859) Bad night (237)

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