But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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