Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I want to have your abortion
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize