wrigley field is MILF paradise
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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