If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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