Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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