Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Randomize
