The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
