:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
