I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I need a burrito and a hug.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
