we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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