who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
