shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize