I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize