Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
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Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
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Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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