By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
