Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
