The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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