I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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