i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
