i used baking grease as lip gloss
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
This couple is walking their pig around campus
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
