i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
