Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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