Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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