I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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